Sometimes bravery doesn’t wear heavy armor and swing a sharp sword. Sometimes it’s more simple and subtle than that. Sometimes bravery is resting from all we are doing to promote ourselves, pad our self-worth, and calm our eating anxieties.

I want to learn how to sense what I need: mind, body, and soul and serve it faithfully and wholeheartedly. When it comes to work and rest, I want to find this secret balanced I see in a team of rowers pounding the river with their oars. In-and-out of the water. I will find my own rhythm in-and-out of work-and-rest; one that propels me forward down my own journey.

I want to find that repeatable rhythm and balance pride has no room to be in. I want nothing, but glorious, vigorous work, balanced with the ability to also heartily enjoy the wonderful life God has given me.

For me, rest requires a trusting and trust requires faith.

For when I go to rest, I fear the bottom will fall out just when I’m enjoying myself. Faith says: even if everything does come crashing down, God will be with me in that moment giving me wisdom and providing for me. There is no need to fear. I can believe that and move on or fester and be held captive in fear pushed to work when I really need rest.

This seems incredibly brave to me, to trust in a God we cannot even see. It seems to me, then, if faith is incredibly brave and if faith is a requirement for true rest, rest is also brave.

To rest, however, I must consciously grip these two fears by the elbow and sternly talk them down into a corner, so they stop bullying me.

One is the fear of NOT-ENOUGH and it can eat me alive. Two, is when I start basing my worth on what I DO vs. simply in WHO I AM before God (redeemed, forgive, enough). These two misconceptions seem to spin inside of me like old knobby mud tires working together to keep true rest ever at bay and my anxieties and fears riled up inside. It’s a dirty mess.

No more. I refuse to live this way anymore. I will take God’s word and apply it to my scared, little heart until the tires calm down and I am finally able to…you’ve got it…REST.

“…They trusted in you, and you didn’t let them down.” – Psalm 22:5B NIRV

“Come to me, all of you who are tired and are carrying heavy loads. I will give you rest. Become my servants and learn from me. I am gentle and free of pride. You will find rest for your souls. Serving me is easy, and my load is light.” – Matthew 11:28-30 NIRV

“Fools fold their hands and ruin themselves. Better one handful with tranquility than two handfuls with toil and chasing after the wind.” – Ecclesiastes 4:5 NIV